Bad mothers are the most
interesting mothers, particularly when they are someone else’s. In this light, Jo Copeland, mother of author
Lois Gould, was a particularly interesting mother. She was a perfectionist who
could not express any kind of warmth or kindness to her two children. Copeland
was a fashion designer for over fifty years, beginning in the 1920’s. Professionally successful and glamorous, she
helped create the American fashion industry (as opposed to the French.) Her
designs were worn by such diverse personalities as Gypsy Rose Lee and The
Duchess of Windsor. Both Copeland and her husband were shallowly obsessed with
appearances and their marriage did not last, leaving Gould and her brother in
the care of nannies and housekeepers. They were isolated in their bedrooms,
subjected to long periods of enforced silence and strict senseless rules. In
general, they were left out of their mother’s life. A father who bragged that
he could “handsome up a room” and a mother who would criticize a daughter for
perspiring or getting a pimple were not best suited for raising children.
However, Mommy Dressing: A Love Story, After a Fashion is not the
emotional, self-pitying memoir it could have been. Gould delves into the story
of her mother’s own emotionally deprived childhood, a childhood that left her
unable to mother her own children. Good writers always have a talent for empathy
and sensitivity that helps them explain the incomprehensible behavior of
others. Lois Gould’s purpose in writing this book was not revenge but
understanding and her success is the reader’s gain.
